Today's Gospel reading is about persistence in prayer and it makes sense particularly in a place like the Holy Land because you can replicate the circumstances in ways that you cannot do it in the West. In the Gospel, it talks about a neighbor banging on your door in need of bread in the wee hours of the morning. the neighbor will persist until she gets what she wants. She will keep banging in her persistence, and it will be annoying, and it will be impolite, but her banging will make you get up and get her what she needs.
It does not matter if you are sleeping and the matter can be addressed civilly later. She is at your door and wants you to answer now. It seems as if you cannot teach certain people politeness or civil manners. The now is what is important. Jesus tells us to be just as persistent in prayer. I do not expect that he condones the impolite behavior, as common as it is. I imagine that in biblical times there were not gates and locks as there is now.
So, this morning, a quiet Sunday morning, I went upstairs to wash the dishes before I showered and bgan my laundry. I was not presentable to the public world. There were two woman noisily chattering outside the window of the Jesuit Centre. It seemed as if they wanted to be heard. They heard a noise inside the house, through open the windows and said, "Let me in. I'm here and I have a program upstairs. Can you open the door? Please open the door. It is hot, and I came early for the program." They sat in the sun while they could have moved under the arbor to get shade, but they sat there so they would not miss the priest who was coming for the program.
I tried speaking but the two of them shouted over me, "Open the door." There could be no conversation. Because I was not presentable and I did not have keys on me, I tried asking them questions, "What time is your program? Who is leading it? What is it about?" They shouted, "So you can't open the door for me?" I asked, "Will the Abouna come to the program?" They shouted, "So you can't open the door?" I said, "Please wait for Abouna. He will come."
Dilemma. If I allow them to enter, I have to stay with them for at least half an hour while they set up the program. Not only that, I will have to provide for them what they need, which they do not find accessible. Turn on the lights, the air conditioning, close the shade, get them some hot water. Yes, their needs will be served, and on the flip side, my time and my needs do not matter to them. They are happy.
Walls and fences make for good neighbors, and in parts of the city, one cannot easily access a neighbor's property. Since the Jesuit Centre has historically run various programs, people have a familiarity with the property and feel they have a right to access it when they need it. Perhaps they do, but the situation needs to be explained. There is also a sense that your private space can be easily violated. It gives insight into the lives of those who lives of many who may not feel like they have any space that is protected or sacrosanct. As the poor or people who are domestic workers, they have few rights or privileges in many situations, and there is no escaping the poor.
The whole situation is disturbing. It is a frequent occurrence that people will lift their heads into windows to see if you are around, which always means that you are available to them, especially as priests. I don't know the circumstances around this morning's event, but for the most part, people do not plan. They have an idea and they show up and get you to be available. Sometimes, someone will say, "I've come to have confessions, and I will feel better if I do it now, and you are here now." They sometimes try to put you into a situation where you feel bad if you do not respond, and you cannot let yourself be put into that situation. You have to set boundaries. People are clever in trying to get you to give them what they want when they want it.
The other day, two children came by the Jesuit Centre on the Friday, a day when no programs are run and no one is in the house. They wanted small amounts of money. If you give it to them, they will come back; you know they are refugees and are sent by their parents, who make them sit outdoors in the sun all day in hopes of getting a couple of dinars.
Some people are simply demanding, just like the Gospel says, because they know it works for them. For a priest not to give them what they want at the moment they want it, causes them to consider you a bad priest. I think the greater work here is to teach people politeness, to be able to set firm boundaries, to help them know the value of planning, and to build relationships that explains something about who they are and what their real needs are.
The point of the Gospel is to be that persistent in prayer, not in neighborly situations, but we have experience where people will be exacting and demanding. The Gospel shows us that we can be this raw, this forceful in our prayer.
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